My Little Cussing Granny

You know, I've always heard that as people age, some tend to not care anymore about certain things. We'll take my granny for instance. My little granny has been a church-goer for the majority of her life. They now don't attend, but it's only due to the corruptions that they have seen in the church's. So now granny and grandpa keep up with their beliefs at home. Now that said, granny has never really been one to cuss. Mmm mmm. Not her. As far as I can remember, granny never used to cuss as I was growing up, and my grandparents are the ones that raised me. I have only one memory of her uttering a cuss word, and that is when she told me to go and change my shorts cause my ass was hanging out. Ah, good memories!

So anyways, today my granny and I spent the day out eating and shopping. Well on the way home we were talking about poo. Literally. I know, you're welcome for the information. But anypoo, my granny also shares things that she never would utter a word of before. And I'm only mentioning it here, cause well, she happens to share this same info with people she runs into at the grocery store. I know, they are welcome for the information too. So it happens to be that she's a little stopped up and she's not "going" like she should. So, I decided to be a smartass and tell her "sorry to tell you granny, but I think you are full of poop". In which she responded "well I always heard it told as being full of shit". Ya, I just cracked up.

I on the other hand have a tendency to cuss too often....but shhhhh! Don't tell granny!

In Loving Memory

On April 9th the family suffered the loss of one of my husband's grandfathers. In the short amount of years that I have gotten to know him, I can truly say that I loved that man. He was always so kind and spunky, very accepting and loving. He was that way up until his last day. I can't even express how wonderful he was. He will be missed by so many. Two of his adult granddaughter's wrote a letter about him, expressing what a wonderful and loving grandfather he has always been and how he from the start always treated them as family. You see, he wasn't their original grandfather. Their original grandfather passed away many, many years ago. And when Gerald stepped in, he accepted them and treated them as family right from the start. His granddaughter was very strong as she stood up there and read this. I think he left a loving mark on everyone he touched, as I can say I feel the same she did even though I was married in to the family, he was always very loving and welcoming, and boy could he make you smile and laugh.

It's Like Meeting Family For The First Time

My family has a long history of terrible choices. The people that I am referring to would be my parents and aunts and uncles. And just what kind of bad choices am I referring to? Hmm, let's see, there are drug addictions, alcohol addictions and men addictions.

Due to this behavior, there were some terrible consequences for not only the users, but also for the whole family and anyone else they decided to harm along the way. I have cousins out there that I remember pieces of our childhood, but I don't really know them. And I have always wanted to know them, I have always felt a deep bond with them across the miles and no contact, I know that they went through just as much as I had to go through with the choices that were made.

On my mom's side of the family...she had two siblings, my aunt and my uncle. My uncle died many years ago from his drug addiction, my mom went to prison and is suffering a disease from her drug addictions, and my aunt never had a drug addiction, but she did have an addiction to men. Due to this, I ended up being raised by my grandparents since I was 8, in which they provided a wonderful life for me. Due to my aunts addictions to men, she pretty much abandoned her two boys. Her one son grew up with his dad instead and her other son got tossed to the side pretty much. He doesn't know who his real father is and had no option but to live with the man his mom divorced since she didn't want to take him. All he wanted was to be part of a family, this I just found out due to us being in contact recently and catching up with eachother. Breaks my heart really. We had a nice long conversation. He had started to go down the wrong path but has realized that he needs to grow up and make sure he is doing well. He pretty much poured his heart out to me, and while it is heart breaking to hear I am also thankful for it. I am looking forward to becoming closer and enjoying having him as part of my family. There are more cousins out there, but I don't have contact with them.

As for my dad's side of the family...My dad had 4 siblings, 3 brothers and 1 sister. Out of them, there is only my dad and one brother left. My dad used to be an addict, but while he doesn't do the drugs anymore, he is an alcoholic with a drink in his hand practically 24/7 and he is also homeless. He suffers greatly from depression. He is a man with a big heart, yet can't handle the world. My aunt just a few months ago died of a drug over dose. She had three children that are all older than me. I don't have any contact with them. I know where one is, but choose not to have contact for a specific reason. My uncle that is still living, I don't have any contact with his 2 daughters either. I don't know where they are, I don't think he knows where they are. I don't really know the whole story there. One of my uncles died of a suicide by a drug over dose, he didn't have any kids. And the other uncle died many years ago from over dosing with a combination of drugs and alcohol, he had two kids. I have in the past few years gotten back into contact with them. We have shared some memories and talked a little about what our parents have done. I really wish we would be able to have more contact, especially face to face, but one lives in Virginia and I'm here in AZ, and the other goes all over the place following her husband in the military.

Watching all the destruction that was caused by my parents and aunt and uncle was all that I needed to see to know that I didn't want to take that path in life. And I want to hold onto every opportunity that I can to be able to get closer to my cousins.